I’ve been to the gym long enough to realize there are several distinct categories of gym-goers. Some are okay and cool but some can really be quite annoying. Without further ado, here goes.
The One Hit Wonder
The one hit wonder can sometimes be seen on the 1st of January every year but they also show up at regular intervals throughout the year. These guys usually sign up for a monthly gym membership, come once to workout and then came to the dreaded conclusion that they aren’t cut out for gym life and you won’t see them ever again. It’s either because they find working out is too hard or too much hassle or they just don’t have the willpower to continue or a million other excuses that they could come up with . Gym owners love these type of people cause they can make a quick and easy profit off them. They hit the gym once and they you wonder where the hell did they go?
Let’s face it, everyone is a gym newbie at one point or another in their life and there’s nothing wrong with that. I just would like to point out their characteristics here. You could tell someone is a newbie by the way they dress — pants or boots or flip flops or even worse jeans. They will usually struggle using most of the workout machines, either putting too much weights or doing it the wrong way, often with comical results. The brave ones would sometimes ask for tips from somebody or the slightly clever one would watch a seasoned gym rat and follow what they’re doing. Sometimes the newbies will also become the one hit wonder once come to realize this shit is hard and they could be at home sleeping or eating or something.
The Social Media Monkey
You know this type. Show up, workout for 5 minutes and then become glued to their phone for the next hour or so. Another type would work out for 10 minutes, took a selfie in front of the mirror, occasionally lifting their shirt to show their (none-existing) six packs (more like flabs) to upload to their favorite social media site. You will see them grinning by themselves tickled by something funny on Facebook or Twitter. The worst kind would hog the bench press area or any other workout area just looking at their phones. Don’t know why they even bother coming to the gym in the first place (probably to show off). Ok taking pictures of yourself or your buddies is okay sometimes but definitely not every time. My advice is, unless you’ve got pecs or six packs to show off to everybody, don’t take a picture in the gym.
The gym that I regularly went to is usually filled with guys but occasionally you see a few chicks (very rare but it does happen) trying to work out. These girls are usually newbies and don’t usually last long or turn into just another one hit wonder. I don’t know whether they have other commitments or they’re just not up to it. When these hot chicks do show up, you can be sure that a guy or two will approach and try to offer (unsolicited) workout advice and tips although nobody asked them for one. Sometimes these romeos do manage to hook up with some of these chicks and you will soon see them working out together. However more often than not, these gym couples will mysteriously disappear altogether for reasons only they know. Maybe they are working out someone else nicer IYKWIM.
The Parent Of The Year
And then there’s this one type who don’t usually go to the gym but when they do they bring their kid(s) along. I understand maybe their partner is working or whatever and they don’t have anybody else to sit for their kids while they workout but the gym is the last place you wanna bring your precious kids to. There’s a lot of heavy weights around and most of the exercise equipments could really pose a danger to those kids. Kids being kids will always play with whatever they can grab their hands on and I saw for myself a few times these children falling off treadmills or having iron weights dropping dangerously close to their body. I don’t know about others by most gyms are not kids-friendly and you should know better than to bring them along.
I know, I know, weight-lifting is a hard work and there’s nothing wrong with a little bit of of huffing and puffing and grunting while you’re at it. What I can’t stand are those who scream and yell at almost every rep and sounding louder than a gorilla during a mating call.
The Relationship Goals
Couples who workout together stay together right? Nothing could be sweeter than bringing your girlfriend to workout together at the gym. You could give each other motivation and for the guys, give out tips and help with every workout. To be honest, I have no problem with these couples. They do look sweet together and most of the time they keep to themselves. And these kind is not limited to guy and girl couple only. Sometimes you see one guy with his regular gym buddy working out together like this awesome power couple (no homo tho). The weird thing about these couples is that if one of them didn’t show up, both of them don’t show up at all.
We all know this type. Works out hard on a bench and then leave the the sweat-drenched bench just like that, expecting somebody else to clean up after him. Who do you think we are, your mother? These jerks will usually move around the weights all over the place and never-ever put them back on the racks. Don’t be a pig at the gym guys, wipe and clean up after yourselves. It’s the right thing to do.
The Casual Gym-goer
Actually you can see this type a lot at the gym. Their standard attire is t-shirt, track suit or shorts and most importantly flip-flops on their feet. These type will never-ever touch the treadmill (what do you expect with their flip-flops?) and skip leg day every day. Their favorite working routine are the squat rack, bench press and bicep curls, that’s about it. Warm up? Those are for noobs. The casual gym-goer will jump straight to their routine, occasionally taking cigarette breaks every half hour. This type usually come in groups and they’d stop and chit-chat with their buddies in between reps. Don’t get me wrong, they will see results with their workout routine, eventually. Cause you know if you’re consistent enough with your work out, you will see changes and improvement sooner or later. That said, some of the casual gym-goers type are also one hit wonders, social media monkeys or pigs.
You see them at least 3 times a week if not every other day of the week. They do proper warm up, run 20 minutes on the treadmill and then do a variety of work out and exercise on almost every machine in the gym. Some of them will have their earphones and music on and just keep to themselves. They don’t give a shit about anybody else, they just come there to work out, huffing and puffing, the hardest worker in the room. It’s easy to recognize them by the size of their huge pecs, shoulders, legs and abs after years of working out. Skip leg day? That’s unheard of! Meet The Rock aka the gym rat or gym buff. They live and die for the gym. Okay not really but these guys are serious about body-building or being buff in general. Most of them are quite friendly and they’re more than happy to share a few pointers about working out. Just don’t bug them too much tho. Even better, watch and learn from these beasts.
So which type is me? Well, obviously I’d like to be The Rock. I make it my mission to go to the gym at least 2 to 3 times a week. Each time I will try to use at least 80% of the equipments for 2–3 hours at least. I used to take a few pictures at the gym before but only to share funny shit of people struggling at the gym or sometimes (just a few seconds) look at pictures of buff people for motivation. I don’t ever take any selfies tho, that’s so lame. I always clean up after my reps and do my best to re-rack the weights. I used to listen to my iPod while I work out but now I get the gym staff to play my music on the PA system, perks of being a long time member of the gym. There you have it folks, the 10 types of people you usually meet at the gym.