Funny captions

I must confess I'm a sucker for funny photo captions, they're just hillarious! I could spent hours surfing the Internet reading those captions. Here's a few of them.

"...and I did that one and that one and that one ..."

“Okay, I may have had sexual relations with THAT woman too!”

"Are you gonna finish those fries?"

"I remember you! State Capitol, 1990. Broom closet. Right?"

Start of the monkey migration season.

No, really, I have a monkey on my back!

Are we there yet?

Normally mild-mannered, Bobo would snap if you made fun of Ducky.

C'mon kid, I was only joking ... you've been good.

Tommy just learned that Harry Potter isn't real.

But I want an iPod!!!

No, you can't have Gwen Stefani.


"This ATM unit has a bad motivator!"

What do you mean Republic Credits are no good here?!

"Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi, I'm completely broke."

"Negative $13?? This is my most desperate hour."

Turns out Obi-Wan wasn't her only hope.



"This is my apprentice, Darth Small."

"My little ... blue ... friend."

"Hmmm... Guess it will have to be... Gryffindor!"

"Good. I can feel your anger. I am defenseless. Take your picture!"

"This one is too small... Throw him back."


"If only... Ben was here."

Boba Fett: "I'm afraid I'll turn out just like my dad too, Luke."

Well, if there`s a bright centre to the universe, we`re in the town that it`s farthest from.

"I can't believe they needed to see our identification."

Apparently this 7/11 does serve their kind.

Dude, where's my starfighter?

"Told you your Jedi mind trick wouldn't work on the clerk!"

"I'm getting the suit on the installment plan!"

He's more teen than man, twisted and nerdy...

"But Mom! I'm just about to fight Obi-Wan!"

"These are NOT dolls, Commander...they are 'action figures'."

"A banana!? Bring it here! Question it, we will."

"I want the rest of my suit, not excuses."

"Mom, close the door so that the TV may send a clear transmission."

"Wow! That Jedi Toe Grip really does work!"

"Leia is my sister! I better cancel those dinner reservations."

"Confused, you appear to be. Forgot your lines, you have.'

"He's dead, Jim!"

"Wait... If Frank is over there, who's playing Yoda?"

"Luke! Attention you must pay! Dying I am! Stop watching that 'American Idol'!"

"Luke... answer door please... a pizza... I ordered."

Photos and captions mostly from Starwars.com

Make fun of myself day

In conjunction with our happy and joyous post-salary/bonus mood here at my office, I'm gonna make today the Make fun of myself day. Here's some flashback pictures from waaaaay back.

Now you've probably heard of big foot in Johore but have you ever heard of Big Hair? They're somewhat related to big foot but more good looking with lots of mojo. It's what people say a chick-magnet? Well, they managed to catch this one on camera at the National Library a few years ago.

Big Hair has evolved quite well compared to their primitive cousin and they normally don people's clothes like jeans and t-shirts, heck they even like to read books at the library some more.



After some quick check, it is learned that Big Hair also likes to have his picture taken among flowers beds. Asked what his aspirations are, Big Hair said: "I wanna be a 80's rock star and take the world by storm, HELL YEAH!". No wonder his hair style is awful.

Today's post was brought to you by the letter L (for lame)

Music of the day

Bowling for Soup - Girl all the bad guys want



8 o'clock, Monday night and I'm waitin'
To finally talk to a girl a little cooler than me.
Her name is Nona, she's a rocker with a nose ring,
She wears a two way, but I'm not quite sure what that means.

And when she walks,
All the wind blows and the angels sing.
She doesn't notice me!

Cause she is watchin' wrestling
Creamin' over tough guys
Listenin' to rap metal
Turntables in her eyes

It's like a bad movie
She is lookin' through me
If you were me, then you'd be
Screamin' "Someone shoot me!"
As I fail miserably,
Tryin' to get the girl all the bad guys want.
She's the girl all the bad guys want!

She likes the Godsmack and I like Agent Orange
Her cd changer's full of singers that are mad at their dad
She says she'd like to score some reefer and a forty
She'll never know that I'm the best that she'll never have

And when she walks,
All the wind blows and the angels sing.
She'll never notice me!

Cause she is watchin' wrestling
Creamin' over tough guys
Listenin' to rap metal
Turntables in her eyes

She likes 'em with a mustache
Racetrack season pass
Drivin' in a Trans-Am
Does a mullet make a man?

It's like a bad movie
She is lookin' through me
If you were me, then you'd be
Screamin' "Someone shoot me!"
As I fail miserably,
Tryin' to get the girl all the bad guys want.
She's the girl all the bad guys want!
She's the girl all the bad guys want!
She's the girl all the bad guys want!

There she goes again
With fishnets on, and dreadlocks in her hair
She broke my heart, I wanna be sedated
All I wanted was to see her naked!

Now I am watchin' wrestling
Tryin' to be a tough guy
Listenin' to rap metal
Turntables in my eyes
I can't grow a mustache
And I ain't got no season pass
All I got's a moped...moped....moped.....

It's like a bad movie
She is lookin' through me
If you were me, then you'd be
Screamin' "Someone shoot me!"
As I fail miserably,
Tryin' to get the girl all the bad guys want.

She's the girl all the bad guys want!
She's the girl all the bad guys want!
She's the girl all the bad guys want!
She's the girl all the bad guys want!
(There she goes again)
She's the girl all the bad guys want!
She's the girl all the bad guys want!
(There she goes again)
She's the girl all the bad guys want!
She's the girl all the bad guys want!

Thanks people

I'd like to thank our System Enginer Safuan, for fixing me an Internet connection direct to our Streamyx pc instead of the usual firewalled/proxied route. You've made my blogging experience so much better.

Mr Safuan, SE

Also many thanks to my boss, for giving us the newly confirmed staff (like me) a bonus together with this month's salary. Although he doesn't have to but he still did, that's so thoughtful of him.

Then I'd like to thank wifey Linda for cooking us dinner everyday and doing the household chores and taking care of Adam and stuff. Don't know what we'll do without her.

Last week also after somebody crashed into my car, I had my first flat tire experience. The truth is, I've been very lucky whenever it came to flat tires. Ever since I started driving there's always somebody to help my change our flat tire, there's my dad and my uncle and that Mobil pump attendant so to be honest I've never tried to change the tire myself. Then when the day finally came for me to do it myself I was almost hopeless. Thank God my tire went flat in the parking lot somewhere in Subang 2 and there's this postman passing by and he was kind enough to show me step by step the right way to do it. I could never thank him enough for helping me out that day and I didn't even catch his name. Talk about kindness of strangers.


Lastly thanks to God for all His blessings although I had some pretty rough tests recently. Without them we'll soon get lost with the pleasures of life.

Champions beaters

Barcelona 1 - Liverpool 2

Liverpool pulled off one of the most stunning results in their proud European history as they came from behind to defeat Barcelona 2-1 in the Nou Camp on Wednesday night. It was a night Liverpool fans will never forget as they watched their side upset the odds to secure a famous, famous victory at the home of the European champions. Owh what a feeling! Although I had to wake up at 3.30 in the morning and stay up for 2 hours, it’s truly worth it.

I thought oh crap, we were in trouble when Deco headed in the opener on the 14^th minute but Craig Bellamy’s equalized 2 minutes before the break gave us the much needed confidence boost.

Me and the rest of Liverpool supporters world wide would have settled for a 1-1 draw against the likes of Barca but we were soon dancing with delight as John Arne Riise smashed home what was to be the winning goal on 73 minutes.


After beating Premiership Champions Chelsea last month, Liverpool seemed to have a knack for beating champions and this time it’s the reigning European Champions turn, in their own backyard some more mind you! Confidence is high at the moment for Liverpool and if we manage to stop Barca at home in two weeks time, I seriously think we can go all the way and win the Champions League again! You just mark my word on that!

My first car accident

Well, I think my first car accident was when the rear wheel of my mother's Proton Saga rolled out of it socket right in the middle of Serdang Raya about 3 years ago. It was pretty scary but I survived the incident without a scratch. This is my first accident with my own car anyway. While I was waiting for Linda who's buying some groceries last night, some Chinese dude reversed straight into my car. This is what happened to the left door on the passenger’s side.

Fortunately that guy did the right thing and own up for his mess. At first he offered to pay me RM200 for the door. Even though I never had any experience with dented cars before, I knew by instinct that 200 ringgit is definitely not enough for the repair. So I called up my dad and he said for a metallic paint, it’s around 1000 bucks. Upon hearing that, I demanded that the guy pay up more but obviously he refused. Said he could get a workshop to do it for a lot less.

I was feeling uneasy by then. So I called my brother in law Zaidi who worked as a JPJ officer. He quickly checked the guy’s license late and came up with all his details like name, address, i.c number etc. Zaidi suggested that I scare him a little by telling him what he can do to his Kejara points so that he would pay up for the damage. I being the nice guy, opted to discuss it peacefully with Khim instead (that’s the Chinese guy’s name). So we agreed to meet up to a workshop nearby tomorrow to get my car fixed. He gave me his phone number and he swiftly drove away.

Upon getting home, Linda was all worried that we might be tricked by that Khim guy and said we should have made a police report in the first place. I thought if we do that then the deal’s off and Khim will definitely get penalized by at least 300 ringgit. I was indeed worried thinking he might give us the slip so I gave Linda’s dad a call (who happened to be a police officer). He said we ought to make a report if Khim doesn’t really show up the next day. It’s okay to delay the report as long as it’s not more than 24 hours. Of course I give Linda’s dad all his details in case he decided to mess with us so that Abah can come here an nab that guy :) I felt really thankful that we got Abah and Zaidi on our side. If that guy tries anything funny, he’ll incur the wrath of one police officer and another JPJ officer!

Linda was close to tears throughout the whole ordeal. She seldom came across such confrontation so she understandably upset. Furthermore she has every right to feel sad since the car’s barely 4 months old and already somebody left a huge dent on it. Adam was oblivious with the whole incident and just gets on doing his things. I was worried of course but decided to keep my cool. Remember the 90/10 principal? Sheet do happen and it’s how you react to it that’s important. I mean I can whine on and on about my bad luck or I can carry on with life.

So early in the morning I gave Khim and call and we agreed to meet up at eleven. I had half expected him to switch off his phone and have a good laugh at us but fortunately he didn’t. He did showed up at eleven, showed me to the workshop and even gave me a lift home. He explained his rear window was foggy last night and he couldn’t see a thing before accidentally reversing into my car. He also said he’s just glad he bumped into a car and not a person. So I called office asking for an Emergency Leave which were duly granted. My thanks to Abang Din and Bujal for being so understanding sporting, I owe you guys one.

The accident gives us some valuable lessons. First of all, be really careful and alert when parking behind somebody else’s car. You’ll never know he might suddenly reverse into you. Also try to get as much info as possible on the other party whenever you're involved with similar incidents. Last night I just got his phone number which is definitely not enough. He could always throw away his sim card, made a police report first and claim us responsible instead. Lastly when you’re in doubt, always ask another opinion. Khim almost got away with just 200 bucks last night if I haven’t made that call to dad and Zaidi. It’s a good idea to ask someone else when you're not sure.

I know this must be a test from God. We’ve been truly blessed by Him lately so now he’s testing us. Even so we felt really fortunate in so many ways. We were fortunate that our family stood by us and gave us all the support we need. We were fortunate that Khim is an honest guy and not some Along-like gangster who’d cause us so much more trouble. We’re fortunate that it’s only a slight dent on our door and nothing serious like bodily harm or anything. It could have been worst you know.

Now I know why it is important that we get along well with our relatives cause you’ll never know when you’ll need their help. I’m glad that it all ends well. Alhamdulillah.

Music of the day

Fall Out Boy - This ain't a scene, it's an arms race




















I am an arms dealer
Fitting you with weapons in the form of words
And I don't really care, which side wins
As long as the room keeps singing
That's just the business I'm in

This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
I'm not a shoulder to cry on, but I digress

I'm a leading man
And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate
I'm a leading man
And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate

I wrote the gospel of giving up
(You look pretty sinking)
But the real bombshells have already sunk
(pre-madonnas of the gutter)
At night we're painting your trash gold while you sleep
Crashing not like hips or cars
No, more like p-p-p-parties

This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race

Bandwagon's full. Please, catch another

I'm a leading man
And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate
I'm a leading man
And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate

All the boys who the dance floor didn't love
And all the girls whose lips couldn't move fast enough
Sing until your lungs give out

This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
(Now you)
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
(Wear out the groove)
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
(Sing out loud)
This ain't a scene, it’s a god damn arms race
(Oh, oh)
This ain't a scene, it's a god damn arms race

I'm a leading man
And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate
I'm a leading man
And the lies I weave are oh so intricate, oh so intricate

Why is the sky blue?

Ever wondered why is the sky blue? I thought the sky is blue because it reflects light from the oceans. But after reading this article by this cool astronomer, Phil Plait, now I really know why. Now you can tell your kids the real truth about what made our sky blue (and not that lame made-up story :P)

blue sky

(by Phil Plait of Badastronomy.com)

Answer: The sky is blue because it is scattering blue light from the sun.

If the sky were blue due to reflection from the oceans, wouldn't the sky be less blue farther inland? It isn't, so this cannot be the correct explanation.

We actually need to start this explanation far from the Earth: we need to look at (figuratively, of course) the Sun. The path of your typical photon from the Sun to the surface of the Earth is a tortuous one. Created in the Sun's core, it takes up to one million years for the photon to make its way to the Sun's surface and then to race away. After all that time it only takes a little over 8 minutes to reach the Earth, but when it hits the top of the Earth's atmosphere, it still has one last dance to perform.

the sun

As a photon encounter particles (such as nitrogen and oxygen molecules) in the Earth's atmosphere, it scatters off these particles. In other words, it hits a molecule and rebounds off in some other direction. The amount of scattering depends on a lot of things, but mostly on the amount of stuff in the air and the wavelength, or color, of the light. The shorter (bluer) the wavelength of light, the more it is scattered. Ever notice how red brake lights on cars are easily visible through even a relatively dense fog? That's because red light scatters less. If brake lights were blue, you'd be having a lot more unexpected meetings with cars in front of you!

Now sunlight may look white, but actually it is made up of many colors; in fact, it is a smooth blend of all the colors in the rainbow. That's why, when you pass light through a prism, you see a rainbow: the prism breaks up the white light into its component colors.

this is how a photon supposed to look like

When a stream of photons of all different colors comes into the atmosphere, the red, orange, yellow, and even green ones tend to get through unimpeded. But the photons that are more blue tend to get scattered away. They fly off in some other direction, until they hit another particle and scatter again. When you look up in the sky at the Sun (of course, you should never ever look at the Sun without lots of special protection, but hey, this is a description, not an order), chances are you'll see very few blue photons coming directly from it; they have all been scattered away. Those scattered photons still get to the ground, and to your eyes, but they will come from some random direction (from wherever they were scattered last before they hit your eyes). So everywhere you look you see blue photons, except directly from the Sun, where you'll see all colors. This is why the sky is blue!

Note also that the amount of scattering depends on how much air the light goes through. When the Sun is low in the sky, the light has to travel through a lot more air than when it is high in the sky. The top of the atmosphere follows the curvature of the Earth, so near the horizon the distance through the atmosphere is a lot longer than near the zenith (a great image of this effect is available at the NASA Langley Research Center website). By the time the Sun sets, the light pushes through so much air that even the green and yellow photons get scattered. This makes the Sun look redder at sunrise and sunset. The sky does not look blue near the horizon because more yellow photons (and even orange ones right at sunset) are coming from that direction as they get scattered away from the Sun.

.............................................................

So now you know. Sounds like rocket science to you? I thought so too at first. Only after reading the article a couple of times then only I truly understand. I have a lot of respect for Phil Plait and his Bad Astronomy website. Found out about him from reading his book Bad Astronomy at the National Library few years ago. Never know being an astronomer is that cool.

Also check out his piece on debunking Astrology.

Happy Birthday Mom!

That's my mom in yellow

Yesterday (February 13th) is my mom's birthday. I just wanna wish happy birthday mom, may you have many more great and wonderful years ahead of you and don't worry, your present will be on it's way soon!

To be honest, I don't remember how old she is this year (I don't even know when my dad's birthday is). But the important thing is your 4 adorable kids still remember about your birthday yesterday and you still got someone to wish you Happy Birthday. I know I didn't turned out to be the child you hoped to be, plus sometimes we had our differences I just want you to know that I still love you no matter what.

Thanks for treating us KFC yesterday. Mom is usually very errr, sparing with her money and taking us out for dinner is a real rarity so when she did, it's a big deal to me. The last time she treat us anywhere is when she got her brand new Myvi.

Anyway, Happy birthday again mom, thanks for everything.

Welcome Nur Shafy Hani!

Congratulations to my sister in law Lin & hubby for the birth of their first child Nur Shafy Hani last Thursday!

We cancelled all our weekends programs and drove all they way to Manjung to see her on Saturday.



Due to some complication right before delivery, Lin had to undergo a c-section instead of normal birth. According to Dr. Afif: "A C-section delivery is performed when a vaginal birth is not possible or is not safe for the mother or child. Surgery is usually done while the woman is awake but anesthetized from the chest to the legs by epidural or spinal anesthesia. An incision is made across the abdomen just above the pubic area. The uterus is opened, the amniotic fluid is drained, and the baby is delivered." (Wow, I never know I knew that!).



I heard c-sections or cesarean section births can be quite a painful experience for mothers. Just watching my wife delivering Adam the natural way looks painful enough, imagine going through a surgery where they cut you open and stuff! Anyway, I'm glad Lin had gone through delivery safe and sound and she is currently recuperating at her place in Manjung, Perak.



Congratulations again Hazlin and Subree, brace yourself for some sleepless night for the next 6 months! Trust me, we've been there and done that :).



Okay2, raising a kid is not that hard. You'll just need some tender loving care and a lot of patience. Yes the first 6 months would be quite an experience but after that you'll find all those sleepless nights and hardship is truly worth it. Good luck guys!

Freedom fighters

Last week our System Administrator had blocked our access to two websites, namely Myspace.com & Friendster.com. After that surprise move to prevent some of our staff from wasting their time visiting those sites, many were shocked and clearly unhappy with that decision. "We only surf those sites like 10 minutes top everyday, wtf are you saying about we wasting our time!" said one angry co-worker. (don't believe him, that angry co-worker spent more than 10 minutes each day on Friendster & Myspace) Rumours has it they're considering banning Yahoo Messenger as well since that popular messenger program is eating up our network band-with. I couldn't agree more, that's why I always use Meebo.com - it's web-based, use little band-with and it works just as well. Actually I pity our SA a bit since he's just doing his job by order of The Management. I suppose they needed somebody to blame and couldn't find a more obvious choice than our poor SA.



As for me, I'm quite cool if they wanted to block Friendster of Myspace since I rarely visit them anyway. Just don't block Blogger.com cause my life depends on it (ha ha), that's all I'm asking for. Well, even if they do block Blogger, you know there's over half a dozen way to post to Blogger right? I can always use Google Docs & Spreadsheets, e-mail it Blogger, post it via Flickr or Buzznet and many more. Truth is, they can never suppress freedom. Barely a few hours after the ban, my friends and I had found several ways to bypass our Free Proxy.



You see, our company has an excellent track record at hiring people. They have a knack for hiring very talented people with enormous potential (e.g: me and my friends!). No wonder some of our staff were regularly snapped up by associate companies and other firms every year. So we thought, there's several ways to bypass our proxy. In fact, I found a few dozens ways to bypass our proxy at this particular blog. Most of them were not good enough to trick our proxy server but some of them did pass through! So you listen here Mr. System Administrator, you can never suppress freedom in this era of free-speech and globalization, the good guys will always win against the bad guys and may the force be with us all.

---

In another development, I had to swallow my words (and my pride as well) cause I finally put a mp3 player on my blog. I previously commented that putting those flash player on your blog or site will make them heavy (meaning: long loading time) and sometimes cause problems to certain visitors. Well, Rin's blog still manages to crash my Firefox 2.0 browser from time to time and opening Rina's blog in IE will still be greeted with a couple of pop-up advertisements. Nevertheless, I find the temptation to put a player here is too great to resist. I always wanted to share my favourite songs with everybody so I thought what the heck, I'd put a player there on the side but I would turn off the auto-play function so that you'll have to double-click the song to play it. FYI I never switch off my sub woofer under my desk and every time I open Rin's or Rina's blog, I'll have Babyface or Gwen Stefani suddenly blaring at top volume that the entire office could hear :P

So here it is people, my first flash mp3 player. I'm still figuring out why they never finish the entire song before moving out to the next. Could it be something wrong at the host or is it my player is not working properly? Could you please let me know Rin? Hanum?? Anybody???



p/s: I hope Mrs IT consultant wouldn't kill me for that comment and boss, I only spent 10 minutes jer on this blog tau - cheers!

All time fave song

This is it folks, my all time favourite song.



Nirvana - Verse chorus verse

and if you save yourself,
you will make him happy.
he'll keep you in a jar,
and you'll think you're happy.
he'll give you breather holes,
and you'll think you're happy.
he'll cover you with grass
and you'll think you're happy.

+
Now.....
you're in a laundry room.
you're in a laundry room.
the clues they came to you....

and if you cut yourself,
you will think you're happy.
he'll keep you in a jar,
then you'll make him happy.
he'll give you breather holes,
then you'll think you're happy.
he'll cover you with grass,
then you'll think you're happy.

++

and if you fool yourself,
you will make him happy.
he'll keep you in a jar,
then you'll think you're happy.
he'll give you breather holes,
then you will seem happy.
you'll wallow in the shit,
then you'll think you're happy

---

After 8 (eight) freaking years of searching, I finally found this song yesterday on the Internet. It was streaming from some obscure website so I had to record it live with Audacity. This particular song was really-really hard to find since it was never included in their 6 major albums (which I bought all) and was only available in that very limited edition compilation set which is not sold anywhere here in this country.

I have no idea what the song is about but I suspect it got something to do with a pet guinea pig or iguana. Although it is not as good as Gorgy Porgy (?????) I thought the music and melody are really awesome and I can listen to this song for weeks without ever getting tired of it. Verse chorus verse is a fine example of what a true grunge music sounds like and nobody does it better than Kurt Cobain and Nirvana. So have a listen guys and tell me what you think about it.

Download mp3 here